Going Back to Mexico In My Mind or Full Disclosure

"Joshua's Sister", Mexico, 2006. Juliana Beasley

Yesterday, I had the wonderful pleasure of having Mexican photographer, Eunice Adorno come out to my hometown, Jersey City for a visit. The last time I saw Eunice was in Mexico City in the summer of 2010, when she was my student in a workshop that Tema Stauffer and I taught in collaboration with Toxico Cultura. 

I am very elated and proud of Eunice! She has a book called Fraum Blaum about women Mennonites living in northern Mexico coming out shortly. In Spanish the book is called "Las Mujeres Flores" or in English "The Flower Women :  the editor is Pablo Ortiz Monasterio and Fernando Gutierrez and is published with Fabrica. The images are very intimate and the color palette very soothing.

Cover of "Las Mujeres Flores" by Eunice Adorno.

Now, Eunice and her dog, Cleto are living temporarily in New York and she is partaking in a residency at the International Studio and Curatorial Program. And to top it off she is off to Holland in October, to take part in the prestigious Joop Swart Masterclass.  Wowsie! What an amazing year for such a talented and young photographer.

I am looking forward to her next visit and next time with Cleto who can keep my little Howard (Howard definitely needs a FB page) company, now that he is an only child.

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I wish I could put a torch to most of my life right now. In fact, as an experiment and because I feel that I feel compelled to document the state of my life visually... I will take some photographs to post next time. Because I hope that soon my situation will change. And I hope that the state of it right now will soon be a memory only visible in photographs.

I also believe that since things feel completely impossible right now (or simply feel that way)  that I want to expose myself.

Why?

No, this isn't a shaming masochistic technique to haul ass and clean up and stop avoiding... but a full disclosure or a substantial disclosure of me right now as I am.

AGAIN WHY?

I wouldn't ask less from any of my subjects so, why should I pretend to be anything more that I am. Yes, the shit has hit the fan and it's time to accept it as it is right now because as said, it will change. Slowly, but it will change.

Will this help my career as a photographer? Could it damage it? These are some of the questions that have come up over the last year when speaking to close friends. Only time can tell. I'll go with my instincts.

It's time for self-portraits. Anyone, with skills in this realm... please, contact me through Facebook. I have some questions on how to set it up, etc. I have questions.

In the meantime, I still have the fantasy of my vacation in Mexico with Victoria over 5 years ago. And so, here are some more photographs to keep me out of harm's way or rather just away from the present. Here are more images about Joshua and his family in the south of Mexico

Thank the Universe that I will be photographing this weekend. And in the spirit of all the young photographers out there and even my contemporaries, I will be shooting with my Canon dSLR and not with my Rollei TLR... how avant garde... right?

"Joshua's Brother and Sister Upside Down", Mexico, 2006. Juliana Beasley

"Joshua's Other Brother in Bed", Mexico, 2006. Juliana Beasley